It’s Never Simple – Part 2

The saga of things going wrong in and around my house continues. Old problems are not going away, and new problems have sprouted up to join the old ones.

Since we last met, in addition to a broken water pipe under the driveway, no internet service, and an endless parade of service tech’s showing up at my house, I now have a non-functioning car to add to the list of things turning my hair gray.

Okay, more gray than it already is.

The car is one of those gas/electric Toyota hybrids that is supposed to save the owner money on gasoline. Well, given that I can’t get it out of the garage, the statement is true. I am saving a bundle on fuel costs.

I should have stayed away from the hybrid cars since I’m pretty sure the word “hybrid” is just Latin for “all kinds of shit can go wrong with this thing.” The vehicle is only five months old and it’s already having more problems than the fifteen-year-old Volvo it was bought to replace.

It’s currently nothing more than a great big paperweight in my garage that I can’t get rid of.

Why is it still in the garage instead of at a dealership somewhere getting repaired? That’s a very good question. And I have a very good response: I still have a massive hole in my driveway that would prevent a tow truck from reaching the car to tow it away.

(If you are unsure as to why I have a hole in my driveway, I assume you did not read last week’s rant … I mean, blog.  You may want to take a moment to read it and catch up with everyone else. Go ahead. We’ll wait.)

So, moving on, that broken water pipe that got fixed, didn’t really get fixed. I waited a couple days for the mud to dry out so I could put new rock over it, but it never dried out. Oh, no, indeed. In fact, it got wetter.  After two days, there was a puddle of water marking where the mud used to be.

You see, the repaired water pipe was now leaking just as badly as the original pipe. By the time I realized the problem was getting worse, not better, it was the weekend. I called Plumber Jeff, but he was on his days off and could not get back to my house until the following Monday.

EM2 suggested that we just leave it alone and maybe by summertime we would have a new pool to swim in. She saw the reaction to her statement on my face and asked, “Too soon?” Then wandered off to her room laughing.

I’m glad someone could see the humor in the situation. I sure couldn’t.

When Plumber Jeff arrived on Monday, he told me if the leak was from the work he had previously done the repairs would be free, but if it was a new leak, he would have to charge me for his time again. I told him I didn’t have any more money, so if it was a new leak he could have the brand new Toyota in my garage as payment. I figured it he managed to tow that piece of garbage away I could kill two birds with one stone.

Or rather, solve two problems with one plumber.

The leak turned out to be part of the job Jeff had done earlier, so I still have the car.

I have mixed feelings about that outcome.

The leak is now fixed, but the dirt in the hole is still more liquid than solid. I can’t repair the driveway until the mud is dry. A tow truck can’t get in my driveway because it can’t turn around and hook up my car without the entire driveway available. I can’t get my car to a dealership without a tow truck, because the entire electrical system is completely fried and it won’t move out of the garage. I can’t get the car fixed until I can get it to the Toyota dealership.

Here’s the fun part. Are you paying attention?

Because the car isn’t working right now, my wife has been driving my truck to work every day. Not normally a problem since I work from home and don’t need to go anywhere most of the time. However, I do need the truck to get a load of rock to repave the driveway. But I don’t have the truck, because my wife is driving it, which means that hole in our driveway isn’t going anywhere.

And now we have come full circle. I gave the damn mouse a cookie and he threw it back in my face.

A leaky pipe has brought my entire world to a screeching halt.

The only thing that could make this whole ordeal worse would be if our internet stopped working at the same time.

Oh, right. Did I mention that our internet stopped working?

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