I recently read an article in Newsweek that alcohol sales went up 55 percent in the last week of March. (https://www.newsweek.com/us-alcohol-sales-increase-55-percent-one-week-amid-coronavirus-pandemic-1495510) The article speculates that since a large population of Americans are now stuck at home with nowhere to go, they are drinking more heavily and more frequently. Whether this is due to boredom, fear, or stress relief, the article didn’t say. I think it’s probably a combination of all three.
For myself, I have noticed a major increase in the number of nights each week that I have a drink and the amount of alcohol I consume when I do drink. 55 percent actually seems a little bit of a low estimate. I would argue that there are many people in the U.S. right now that aren’t holding up their end of this new statistic. To them I say, “Stop making the rest of us do all the work.”
During the week, I typically get outside for about an hour every morning to take a walk. The rest of the time, I am locked up in my house with no place to go. Just last year, an opinion piece in Vox argued that prisoners held in their cells 23 hours a day was a cruel, inhumane, and unjust punishment for even the most serious of criminals. (https://www.vox.com/future-perfect/2019/4/17/18305109/solitary-confinement-prison-criminal-justice-reform)
I haven’t committed any crimes and yet I’m being told I have to stay in lockdown possibly for months to come. How is this even legal? Is it any wonder I’m drinking more to compensate? The choices are I either down a couple gin & tonics, or I start a prison riot in my own living room.
I have a television, but so do prisoners. I have access to books and the internet. But, again, so do prisoners. In addition, prisoners are provided three meals a day and all the toilet paper they need free of charge. I have to get my own food. And toilet paper? Well, we all know how that whole deal is going.
The only thing that I used to have that they don’t have is the ability to go hang out in a restaurant with a few friends.
That’s gone.
Now, I have 60 minutes of time in the morning walking around my neighborhood and waving at the neighbors as they stare at me through the windows of their houses. The rest of my day, I can only stand in the window and look outside to see whose turn it is to walk in the yard.
Junk food and booze seem to be the only methods of dealing with the boredom of being trapped. Junk food and booze also seem to be the only things that grocery stores aren’t running short of. Is it any wonder then, that I spend a large part of my day wandering between the pantry and the refrigerator? If I’m eating, I’m not thinking about the fact that I can’t go anywhere. I settle down at night, of course, because that’s when I start the slow alcohol drip that will eventually allow me to fall asleep on the couch.
Alcoholism used to be a disease that people tried to treat. Overeating was similarly recognized as a problem. Today, they seem to be socially acceptable coping mechanisms for existing in a pandemic.
It should come as no surprise to anyone reading this that I have gained more than 10 pounds in the last month or so, and it is likely that trend will continue into the foreseeable future. My heart and my liver seem to be in a race to see which body organ can go into complete failure first. Presently, the liver has a small lead, but my heart is running a close second.
When a vaccine for the Covid-19 virus is finally developed and the world gets back to normal, I am curious to see what the death rates for liver failure and heart disease will be over the next few years. I’m betting that there will be a definite climb in the numbers.
Maybe … oh, I don’t know. About 55%?
In the meantime, I will keep eating whatever junk food I can find in the pantry, and I will keep drinking large quantities of alcohol to make sure I remain passive and don’t attack any family members. They may be annoying, but I don’t want to hurt them.
Even though some of them really deserve it.
(I’m looking at you, EM1. Wash your damn dishes once in a while.)
I could probably keep complaining about this for several more pages, but I can see by the clock on the wall, it’s time for me to go.
The warden has me on a strict schedule and I don’t want to miss my yard time.
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