Last week, I took my nineteen-year old daughter out for a driving lesson. No, you don’t need to go back and reread that sentence. I will say it again so there is no confusion: I took my nineteen-year old daughter out for a driving lesson.
When I was a teenager, I couldn’t wait to get behind the wheel of a car. The day after I turned sixteen, I was at the DMV taking my behind the wheel test, and I was a licensed driver … well, eventually.
Anyway, my point is, driving was something every kid my age wanted to do. A driver’s license represented freedom to a teenager; the ability to go places you previously couldn’t get to on foot or by bicycle. Maybe my parents weren’t so thrilled to know that I was out late at night, unsupervised on the roadways, but for me, it was the best thing in the world.
Today, that desire to get a driver’s license doesn’t seem as important. At least not to my kids. EM1 didn’t get her license until she was eighteen. EM2 is currently nineteen, and I don’t know when (or if) she will be getting hers.
EM2 has her learner’s permit. She has had it for almost a year and a half now. She has had it for so long, she had to go back to DMV a few months ago and renew it because it had expired. I don’t think I have ever previously known a kid with a learner’s permit that expired. It is mind boggling to me that she actually had it in her possession long enough that she needed to go get another one. Who does that? It’s like someone handed her a ticket to the Super Bowl, and she tossed it in a drawer and said, “Maybe, I’ll go to the next one.”
If my daughter was the only person impacted by this decision, I would be happy to let her remain a pedestrian. It isn’t just her, however. At nineteen, she should not still be relying on her mother and me to chauffer her around town. She’s in college, for crying out loud, and we still get phone calls from her asking us to drive her places. I’m sorry, but I have better things to do during my day than drive an hour across town, pick up an ungrateful kid and relocate her three miles from her original location.
Okay, I don’t have anything better to do. But, I still don’t want to do it.
So, last week, during EM2’s spring break from school, I told her she was going to get some practice driving and then make an appointment with DMV to test for her license.
She wasn’t terrible behind the wheel. She only tried to kill me once. While pulling out of a driveway, she “forgot” that cars come at us from both directions on the roadway, and she didn’t notice there was car coming at us from the right while she was making a left turn. Fortunately, had that car hit us, it would have only impacted with my side of the vehicle.
EM2 would have been fine.
I think I yelled a little bit. Or maybe, I yelled a lot. I don’t really remember. I was sort of busy watching my life flash before my eyes.
Look, I am not the most patient teacher. I know that about myself. Despite my best efforts to stay calm and supportive, I lost my temper a few times. On a couple occasions, we needed to pull the car over so EM2 could cry. I am not exactly proud of that.
Well, maybe a little bit. After being retired from law enforcement for almost three years, it was nice to find out I still know how to make a new driver break down into tears.
Some skills, you just never lose.
The rest of the drive was fine. EM2 does pretty well when the car is moving. I did discover, however, that she has no idea how to park a car. Whether she is parking in a parking lot, at the curb, or in our own garage, EM2 somehow managed to stop the car in the wrong place, and at an odd angle, every time. It happened so often, I started to think she was intentionally messing with my head.
Every time she stopped the car, it involved backing up and pulling forward a dozen or more times, and during the entire procedure, I had to listen to her talking herself through each move:
“Nope. Hmmm. Okay, I think I need to go … left. No. Wait, I got it. Nope. Is that straight? What if…? Okay. Oops. I meant to… Back up. There. Got it!” (Opening the door, to look outside.) “Nope. One more time…”
I just hope the DMV evaluator doesn’t fail her when she puts a wheel up on the curb, parking after her test.
Whatever happens in the next couple of months, my wife and I are done playing shuttle driver. If EM2 successfully gets her driver’s license, that would be wonderful. If not, we are buying her a bicycle. Although, if she ends up with a bike, I will need to teach her how to ride it.
Did I forget to mention, EM2 never learned how to ride a bicycle, either?
Sometimes I am amazed she ever learned to walk.
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